A brighter light?

Im happy, but in doubt. Im smiling, but for how long? It's not anyone's fault, but people have hurt me too much till I believe there will not be someone who wont try hurting me. I dont know. Paranoia. Insecurity. inability to trust. Whatever you may call it. I have a right to feel that way. Be it being selfish or not. Isn't it?
I need to talk to someone but I doubt anyone would give me the answers I would most like to hear.

For now, Il keep smiling, because nothing bad has happened. (: